Have you ever found yourself wishing you had a word to explain a painfully common recurrence in those GTM meetings of yours? Worry not, for we have created a glossary of SaaS terminology that may sound awfully relatable.
So the next time you’re frustrated, feel free to use one of the following words to let your team know exactly how you feel about the situation.
Here’s 13 words you should’ve added to your workplace vocabulary yesterday!
13 SaaS Words to Brighten Your Day
1. BANT Sh*t Crazy
When you’re 45+ mins into a demo, only to realize the prospect has no budget, authority, or need for your product, but they love what they’re seeing.
2. LinkedIn Influencer
Someone who couldn’t make it big on Instagram.
“NFTs are the LinkedIn Influencers of the crypto world.”
When your sales manager is sadistic and makes sure you’re helpless in your time of need.
“I thought he was going to quit but he seems to be really into BDRSM culture.”
When your organization cheaps out on their SPIFFs and sales incentives.
“I single handedly saved my company’s quarter only to get STIFFed.”
5. ARRectile Dysfunction
When you just can’t seem to get your YoY ARR growth rate up like you used to during your organization’s younger years.
“It’s only a matter of time before we’re down with a severe case of ARRectile Dysfunction.”
When you’re enticed by unrealistic roadmap promises into buying a sub-par product.
“Oblivious to all the red flags, I was roadstrapped into buying this “AI” tool.”
7. Trip and replace
A spiritual awakening that takes place when you shift to a competitor’s tool that isn’t debilitating to use.
“It took us just 30 seconds of using Slintel to trip and replace our existing intent solution.”
8. Customer Deathcycle
When your marketing, sales, and customer success processes are so bad that a prospect / customer gets increasingly turned off the more you try to get them to consider your product / renew their contract.
“The account asked us to send the contract since they’re finally finishing up their customer deathcycle with DoomInflow”
When you’re omnichannelly harassed by irrelevant and/or terrible retargeting ads.
“These ominivandals make me want to switch back to my good old Nokia 3310.”
When the ONLY functional thing a freemium product does is lead you to a paywall.
“I can’t believe I spent the last 30 minutes trying to figure this tool out, only to realize it’s a feemium.”
Go To Market the Eff Outta – When you mess up a marketing task or campaign and need to GTM real hard in order to try and reverse the screw-up.
“We need to GTMFO this event if we want to see at least some semblance of an ROI.”
When everything else fails and you’re forced to reallocate your unrealistic expectations (and microscopic budget) onto a growth hacker to no avail. Gotta smack ’em all!
“A miserable quarter meant we were forced into pumping the rest of our budget into growthsmacking.”
Churn + worm – When a customer switches to a competitor, only to switch back a year later.
“It’s gonna be a fun one when he’s back next year after realizing what a churm he was being.”
It Takes Two to Slango
We hope our SaaS terminology will add more color to your work-related frustrations. And if you enjoyed this, it’s said, sharing is caring. It won’t cost you a toe to spread the joy among your colleagues, unless maybe you are, in fact, into BDRSM.
If you and your colleagues use cool SaaS terminology at your workplace, feel free to let us know about it in the comments below! And if you’re more into the serious kind of SaaS terminology, check out our glossary page.